Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Getting a little skeered

I would be a big fat liar if I told you that I wasn’t freaking out about the fact that I will be jobless (by choice) in just over 2 months. I would also be an even bigger liar if I told you I wasn’t still going back and forth on that choice I made just a month ago to go this direction. I am very nervous of what is going to happen once I quit. There will be no turning back once I hand in that notice and it is definitely a scary thought. I have been trying to take a “what happens, happens” approach and have been trying to convince myself that things will work out, even if it gets really hard.

Today though?

Today, for some reason, I have become absolutely terrified. I mean, I have a family to worry about. What the hell am I doing? I feel like I am putting my husband in a very stressful position and even though he has been pretty supportive of this decision so far, I can really start to see the stress in his eyes. He is probably just as, if not more afraid of all of this than I am. I am starting to think that it might be a good idea to try and take out a student loan as a just in case before I quit.

I know that there will be doubts in just about every decision one makes. I am not going to change my plan, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be completely terrified of what is going to happen in July when I hand in my notice.


  1. Be confident in every decision. If you doubt, others around you will doubt. Your first instinct is always the one to go with. (not sure why). You can do it, and if you know the stresses that you have to face, hit them head on. Ok so you feel you need to take out a student loan, do just that. If that is what you feel will help, who cares what anyone else thinks. You, your hubby and your children MATTER!!! But don't second guess your education, it will benefit you all in the end!

  2. Don't worry about a thing, every little thing's gonna be alright. P.S. I love the word Skeered!

  3. You'll do great and things will work out fine.

    It's just like taking an exam...go with your first answer, don't second guess.

  4. I was so afraid that I would be financially crippled by continuing my education. I was going thru a divorce when I finished my AA degree and the thought of students loans when I transferred to the University scared me to death. I don't regret a single penny that I've spent on my education. I promise you that it will be worth it.
    One little thought to ponder is this... many of the students work at the hospital where they do their clinical rotation. In fact most hospitals will hire you after you finish med-surg , and the majority of them are very cooperative about scheduling your workdays around school. Just a thought ! Hang in there :)

  5. Life always has a way of working itself out to what you need the most if you listen hard enough. Says, someone who has flip flopped enough to know your inner turmoil.

  6. If you can get a student loan, I would do it. It just makes a cushion "just in case" and if that eliminates a worry that can interfere with your studies and your home life...then go for it! If, in the end, you don't need are ahead of the game.
    Your education will be worth it in the end.
    Who knows, by the time you finish, there may be hospitals that will actually pay off your loan for you when you get out. I wouldn't count on it, but, I wouldn't rule it out either....
    Be positive, reduce your stress, enjoy your little family. They are only young once! As for your husband, he will also benefit in the future from your taking an educational loan, which usually have deferred payments until done, if it reduces the money a good idea.